For Accompaniment: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcJwz7wu8_s

http://www.filefront.com/15495899/AnubArak-handleit.wmv

As usual, click to embiggen!



This is The Greatest and Best Raid in the World… Tribute.

Long time ago me and my raid Handle It here
we was DPSin' down a bunch of ugly beasts.
All of a sudden,
there shined a shiny demon...
in the middle...
of the arena.

And he said:
"YOU FACE JARAXXUS
FACE FACE FACE FACE FACE FACE FACE"

Well me and Handle It… we looked at each other
and we each said...
"Okay."

And we used the first plan that came to our heads
Just so happened to be
The Best Raid in the World
it was The Best Raid in the World.

Look into my eyes and it's easy to see
There were two boss down
two and one make three
It was destiny.

Once every hundred-thousand years or so
When the Champs don't suck and the heals flow
and the DPS owns oooh

Needless to say
the enemy heals were stunned.
Whip-crack went our DPS
And the Champs were done.
Tirion asked us:
"Wipe to Valkyr?"
And we said
Nay.
We are but men (and a number of sexy ladies)
Anub'aROCK!!
Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah
Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh!

This is not The Greatest Raid in the World, No
This is just a tribute.
Couldn't really play like The Greatest Raid in the World, No.
No!
This is a tribute, oh,
To The Greatest Loot in TotGC,
All right!
It was The Greatest Loot in the Instance,
All right!
And it was the best mother fuckin' raid,
The Greatest Kill in the Raid!

Allllllright!
'Ti Tuga digga tu Gi Friba fligugibu Uh Fligugigbu Uh Di Ei Friba Du Gi Fligu fligugigugi Flilibili Ah
Fligu wene mamamana Sacrebleu!
(guitar solo)
And the peculiar thing is this my friends:
the fight we fought on that fateful night was actually
our final of final attempts!

This is just a tribute!
You gotta believe it!
And I wish you were there!
Just a matter of opinion.
Ah, fuck!
Good God, we're rocking'
So surprised to find you can't stop us, now.
We're on fire--
O hallelujah I'm done! Lich motherfucker you're next oooh
All right!
All right!

Where to STARt?




As usual, click the groupshot to embiggen it.

I have a bit of a story for you all.

A long time ago, there was an island filled with sentient Seagulls called Beakland. Aside from the fact that its denizens were sentient Seagulls, their civilization was very much like ours. They had jobs and families and even chores.

This story is about a clique of 5th-grader Seagull friends.

Joe Gull, Steve Gull, Mary Gull, Stu Gull, Al Gull and Jenna Gull were all very close and had known each other since Seagull preschool. Being young adolescent Seagulls, they did not much like having to do their chores. One night, as they sat around a campfire, Steve Gull came up with a plan.

Rather than doing their chores every day, Steve Gull proposed they make a large list of their chores and assign one chore for each of them to do, alternating every so often so that it would vary.

They only had five main chores so every day, one of them would get a day of rest and no chores.

Getting to the chores, the most unloved chore of all was cleaning the toilets. Seagulls are not known for being particularly dextrous with toilet paper and wiping and.... yeah, gross.

Next was taking out the garbage. Seagulls liked to pick at and eat garbage so this chore was not all that bad. Really, it was more like a chore/snackrun.

Third was washing the dishes. Seagulls were not particularly good at washing dishes as they did not have hands and could only hold the dish or the dishrag in their beak at once... and soapy dishrags were not exactly a barrel of fun to hold in your mouth.

Fourth was going grocery shopping and stocking the fridge with all kinds of things we humans would probably find incredibly disgusting! And... the process is strangely similar to chore #2... come to think of it...

And lastly, Seagulls had to clean up after themselves because they often shed feathers and down throughout the day. Down pickup was a pretty busy job since you pretty much had to keep at it all day long.

Well, Jenna Gull's mother helped them to make their big sign and they began to draw names from a hat to assign their chores!

JOE GULL ON DAY OFF

Well, Joe Gull was very happy with this. No chores today! Can't get much sweeter than that.

STU GULL ON TOILETS

Can't say Stu Gull was very pleased with this outcome. He began muttering to himself.

MARY GULL ON GARBAGE

Mary Gull licked her lack of lips in anticipation.

JENNA GULL ON DISHES

Jenna Gull shuffled over next to Stu Gull and began muttering as well.

STEVE GULL ON GROCERIES

Steve Gull waddled over to Mary Gull.

Just as they were about to draw the final name from the hat, a loud noise came out of nowhere! They looked over and there were a pair of teenager Seagulls fighting over at the Beakland Outdoor Basketball Arena! Well, they all saw this and Jenna Gull's mom got scared and said 'You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air!' I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror. If anything I can say that this cab was rare but I thought 'Nah forget it' - 'Yo homes to Bel Air!' I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo homes smell ya later!' I looked at my kingdom I was finally there to sit on my throne as the Prince of Bel Air.

YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT. I JUST BEL-AIR'D OUR FRONTPAGE UPDATE. WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT? I DON'T HAVE TO TAKE YOUR CRAP, I'M A CELESTIAL DEFENDER. WE'RE CELESTIAL DEFENDERS, DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? WE GOT THE REALM FIRST KILL OF ALGALON-25! FUCKING EH! THAT IS A ONCE-ONLY ACHIEVEMENT. OTHERS MAY COME AND DEFEAT ALGALON BUT OUR CELESTIAL DEFENDER TITLE IS A TESTAMENT TO HANDLE IT AND THE DEDICATION AND SKILL EACH ONE OF US HAS PUT INTO THIS RAID. THIS IS A LEVEL OF AWESOME THAT CANNOT EVEN BE EXPRESSED FULLY IN CAPS LOCK - CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL THOUGH IT MAY BE.

Seriously, though, remember when we first started Ulduar and we briefly talked about Algalon? When we found out there was a one-hour time limit to work on him, we figured we had a pretty good chance at getting the first kill on him. We only need two nights a week of raid to be server firsts because we are damned good. Well, as it turns out the one-hour limit wasn't really a stumbling block, it was the fights leading up to him (Especially that robo-whore Mimiron). Still, we were the first to take down Freya3. We were the first to take down Mimiron hardmode. And Alliance stragglers be damned, WE WERE THE FIRST TO TAKE DOWN ALGALON ON BOTH 10-MAN AND 25-MAN.

Congratulations, Handle It. You all fucking ROCK.

(P.S. The last chore in the hat was AL GULL ON DOWN) ^_^

First, some theme music: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NOErZuzZpS8

I have to say I am STOKED to bring you this update.

Pfft, who needs a warm up? We all got fired up and we must have been on a real hot streak because Mimiron finally went down. Yes, long before we suffered any kind of burnout we managed to burn down that rascally mechagnome. Yeah, we smoked him. I just wish we had some kind of convention we could all head to to brag about this. We could even bring little con-flags. I'd brag to my brother but I find my kin-dull.

Now, remEMBER, we *will* need to light one more funeral pyre for Mimiron. Yes, it's a kill that I'm sure will be forever emblazoned in our minds but get ready to combust your asses off (and get your arse-on) for one more moment blazing glory.

Wait, you say I've been punning again? Well, flame me if you must but if I didn't I would be out of my element. I'm just trying to make light of the situation! It was never my intention to take heat over it.

I better get going, though. I don't want to be late.... and every second I spend here, *I'm mo' late*.

On to Algalon The Observer. Hot.


Click the pic for full-size awesome.

Oak-ay. There's no need fir pining, I knew we wood win. We spruced up our game and went to Ulduar with the intention of giving a hearty birchslap. Standing ready, our tank asked we were ready for the pull. We replied "Yes, you maple."

TIMBER! Freya's wrath has been uprooted and things are now looking plum and evergreen. You want proof? How about I leaf this here:



I won't apologize for those puns because I doubt that would help to make me any more poplar. Besides, I'm a total sap for tree puns. I'll stop now, though, because I'm sure you'd be sycamore.

Mimiron's next. Onward, brave paratroopers! Onward to sweet, glorious, fiery death.

Talking and explanation below.















PHEW!

We've been busy! Here's a quick rundown of Ulduar progress:

1) Vezax hardmode is down! Saronite Animus made inanimate!
2) Auriaya hardmode is down! I think we cat-nipped her right in the bud.
3) HUGE GRATS to those members of the 10-man raid who TOOK DOWN ALGALON! REALM FIRST, STARCALLER TITLE. FUCKING RIGHT!

Freya hardmode is advancing nicely and we should have her down any day now! This leaves us with only Mimiron hardmode before we get a crack at Algalon and at that point it's just Yogg (one watcher) before our drakes!

Moving on to the NEW raid. Lets talk about ToC. We cleared 10-man ToC after the raid finished but how about we skip the smallToC and get right to 25-man business, shall we?

1) Gormok Impaled;
2) Not One, But Two Jormungars not lost, but one!... er... won!
3) Icehowl took a wrong turn at Albequerque - The three beasts of Northrend have been vanquished!
4) A pesky gnome got Majordomo'd but Jaraxxus got Jaroxxored.
5) This was GREAT. Epic, bloody carnage of awesomeness +10!! The Alliance Champions were hectic, chaotic and a real thrill to get slaughtered by.
6) We beat those Alliance Champions, though, and the only way I could properly show you the carnage involved was to make you turn your head to one side (The "GT right" side).
7) Twin Val'kyr: Fjola Lightbane and Eydis Darkbane. Well, we had a ton of fun playing Ikaruga with them but you might as well call us Val'kyrbane because we turned them from Black and White to Black and Blue!
8) Anub'arak returns. Tempest Keep was merely a setback!... er... Azjol'nerub, rather. After playing Lord of the Flies with the Lord of the Locusts, we chanted “Kill the beast! Cut his throat! Spill his blood!”, hit that him with a rock and threw him off a cliff! I guess that makes him An00b'a-rock?

Bravo, Handle It. Keep up the excellent work.